I’m stuffed! Albany (ALB) to Washington, D.C. (IAD) to Tampa (TPA)

Wow. I just had an edible and (actually) pretty tasty meal onboard my Dulles (DC) to Tampa flight. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves…let’s revisit the morning.
The alarm went off a bit after 4am. I woke up though. Chris 1 – Failure 0. I am a sucker for early flights. Why? I simply don’t know. Well…now I’m lying. I know why. Phillies Spring Training. Duh.

Every year I take a trip to Tampa/Clearwater with my dad, Kim, Nick and Derek during spring training. We have a routine. You know…not the daily sss one (if you don’t get it…don’t ask), but the something out of the ordinary yet still happens on a recurring basis kinda thing. Got me?

We book the same hotel (before we left the previous year)…order tickets for 2 home games…stop at the original Hooters upon arrival…rent a car that is way too small for 5 people + luggage…and drink – a lot.

My dad and the crew live in Wilmington, DE (poor souls got way more snow than me this year!) I fly out of Albany of course so we book flights that arrive in Tampa around the same time. Ideally I’d fly US through Philly to meet them…then continue with them to TPA. Hasn’t happened that way yet! This year I’m flying United (UA) through Dulles to Tampa…arriving 7 minutes before the US flight from PHL. Last year I did end up flying US (from Quebec City…but that’s a boring work story) and we ended up arriving at gates next to each other. United flies into a different “pier” than US so this year it will be a grand reunion in baggage claim. Of note is the Delta SkyClub in the same pier as United…so if they are delayed I can at least have my free g&t’s while I wait!

So Albany “International” Airport…I love you. Seriously. Aside from maybe Lincoln, NE, you are my favorite. Short walks between gates, friendly unpaid old people “helping” you do things you’ve done 80,000 times, announcements for Ma and Pa Kettle who left their cane behind at security, a decent food selection, and of course…Bonnie at my favorite restaurant. But seriously…you have the most inept TSA screeners/screening ever. 5 “lanes”, 3 id-check lanes, and hardly any passengers. Theoretically…ideal. Realistically…disaster. You suck. I don’t know how to explain it other than by saying…you delay me more than the elite UA line at LAX. And that’s pathetic. You are terrible and should all be fired. Seriously. There are plenty of skilled unemployed people in the ALB area to replace you. And do me a favor…don’t find a new job interacting with the public.

So on to the flights…

I was later than usual to the airport and after the security debacle…arrived at the gate about 2 minutes or so before boarding. Nice! Boarding was normal. I was one of 2 in first class on the CRJ-700 flight to Dulles. Flight time: 1 hour. Load: light. Events of note: none. Drank a pre-departure orange juice and an in-flight sprite. Boring. Landed in the upper C gates at IAD. (For regular UA flyers you can appreciate not arriving at the terrible A gates.) A short walk to D2 and the flight to Tampa was boarding already.

Onboard the A320 I was expecting a very typical UA shorthaul 2 hour flight with nothing particularly interesting. Boy was I wrong! I didn’t get an omelette! That’s right. For the first time ever on a flight in United First in the morning…there was not an omelette onboard. In place of the omelette for this 12 seat first class cabin was “eggs fritatta”. Essentially two small “pancake” sized scrambled eggs with the regular spinach stuffing from the omelette. Covered with cheese and served with potatoes and the always-disgusting “sausage”. Small plate of fruit, croissant, jam and a vodka-cranberry. I ate the eggs! I don’t know why I’m so amused by this…but it was actually decent (read: it was the best breakfast I’ve had in the air).

Service on this flight was very good. 20 minutes to go. 65 degrees with clear skies in Tampa. Did I mention that I find the new leather seat covers to be a bit hard on the butt? Hi Estelle!