Every year I take a trip to Tampa/Clearwater with my dad, Kim, Nick and Derek during spring training. We have a routine. You know…not the daily sss one (if you don’t get it…don’t ask), but the something out of the ordinary yet still happens on a recurring basis kinda thing. Got me?

We book the same hotel (before we left the previous year)…order tickets for 2 home games…stop at the original Hooters upon arrival…rent a car that is way too small for 5 people + luggage…and drink – a lot.

My dad and the crew live in Wilmington, DE (poor souls got way more snow than me this year!) I fly out of Albany of course so we book flights that arrive in Tampa around the same time. Ideally I’d fly US through Philly to meet them…then continue with them to TPA. Hasn’t happened that way yet! This year I’m flying United (UA) through Dulles to Tampa…arriving 7 minutes before the US flight from PHL. Last year I did end up flying US (from Quebec City…but that’s a boring work story) and we ended up arriving at gates next to each other. United flies into a different “pier” than US so this year it will be a grand reunion in baggage claim. Of note is the Delta SkyClub in the same pier as United…so if they are delayed I can at least have my free g&t’s while I wait!

So Albany “International” Airport…I love you. Seriously. Aside from maybe Lincoln, NE, you are my favorite. Short walks between gates, friendly unpaid old people “helping” you do things you’ve done 80,000 times, announcements for Ma and Pa Kettle who left their cane behind at security, a decent food selection, and of course…Bonnie at my favorite restaurant. But seriously…you have the most inept TSA screeners/screening ever. 5 “lanes”, 3 id-check lanes, and hardly any passengers. Theoretically…ideal. Realistically…disaster. You suck. I don’t know how to explain it other than by saying…you delay me more than the elite UA line at LAX. And that’s pathetic. You are terrible and should all be fired. Seriously. There are plenty of skilled unemployed people in the ALB area to replace you. And do me a favor…don’t find a new job interacting with the public.

So on to the flights…

I was later than usual to the airport and after the security debacle…arrived at the gate about 2 minutes or so before boarding. Nice! Boarding was normal. I was one of 2 in first class on the CRJ-700 flight to Dulles. Flight time: 1 hour. Load: light. Events of note: none. Drank a pre-departure orange juice and an in-flight sprite. Boring. Landed in the upper C gates at IAD. (For regular UA flyers you can appreciate not arriving at the terrible A gates.) A short walk to D2 and the flight to Tampa was boarding already.

Onboard the A320 I was expecting a very typical UA shorthaul 2 hour flight with nothing particularly interesting. Boy was I wrong! I didn’t get an omelette! That’s right. For the first time ever on a flight in United First in the morning…there was not an omelette onboard. In place of the omelette for this 12 seat first class cabin was “eggs fritatta”. Essentially two small “pancake” sized scrambled eggs with the regular spinach stuffing from the omelette. Covered with cheese and served with potatoes and the always-disgusting “sausage”. Small plate of fruit, croissant, jam and a vodka-cranberry. I ate the eggs! I don’t know why I’m so amused by this…but it was actually decent (read: it was the best breakfast I’ve had in the air).

Service on this flight was very good. 20 minutes to go. 65 degrees with clear skies in Tampa. Did I mention that I find the new leather seat covers to be a bit hard on the butt? Hi Estelle!

Today I’m flying ALB-IAD-ORD-IAH. When I checked in this morning, the agent was very nice (she usually is, although she’s a self-admitted non-morning-person). Seeing her at about 5am, she was very curious as to my routing today and suggested a single connection as opposed to my 2-stop itinerary. Double EQM (the current United promotion) was all she needed to hear. Understood.

The flight was totally uneventful. It was quiet, as most 6am departures are. Of note was the gate agent for the Chicago flight (which is on a mainline airbus these days). The Chicago flight leaves at 6am, followed by the GoJet 6:10am to DC. She was very forceful in her gate announcements. Everyone was to check their carry on dimensions prior to boarding. She let everyone know that 5 people yesterday had to gate-check because their bags were too big. She also made sure that everyone knew that if they had to check teir bags on the plane that eeryone qould be staring at them, and would even get mad if they delayed the flight. All of that may be true, but where did professionalism go? C’mon! In fact, she stopped 6 people this morning for trying to board with “illegal” bags. (They were perfectly fine for the airbus!) Overhead bins wouldn’t have been full. The flight certainly wasn’t. She did mention that she’s never seen so many passengers in zone 4 (she likes the PA system a lot!) If you’re curious, United has two gates in Albany on the main concourse level with a counter in between the two gates.

Our FA for this flight was very by-the-book…down to reading (verbatim) her announcements. She was the FA serving First for this particular trip. Blah blah blah. Same stuff different day I guess. I find that these GoJet crews tend to be more rigid and formal (maybe boring) than mainline or TransStates or SkyWest crews. Oh well, by the book service and a smooth touchdown in IAD.

IAD-ORD is next!

Now I’m on UA 656 ORD-ALB after sitting in ORD for almost 5 hours because I didn’t make standby on the earlier flight. Let me tell you…it doesn’t even matter. As a whole, this flight crew is hands down the best I’ve ever had the opportunity to fly with. The captain has pointed out landmarks of interest. Our purser, Glen, is positively fantastic. I lost my upgrade since I did standby and first was already full, but it doesn’t really make a difference on this short hour and a half flight. No drink trolleys, but the crew still did an amazing job (and way more efficient than expected) with drink service.

Back to Glen for a minute. Captain Flanagan would be proud. He distributed business cards with personalized notes to elites (not sure if 2Ps got them or just 1P and up), but this guy is first class all the way. This is the purser! Not the pilot. I’m gonna have to write this one up on FlyerTalk for sure. Glen needs to be an in-flight manager or trainer or something. Every FA should be just like him! My guess, however, is that being in the sky is where this guy wants to be. And it shows!!! Even his announcements were top notch with some changes in voice instead of the typical monotone computerized voice that we’ve all become accustomed to.

Not to go into negative territory, but I need to rant real quick. Just because you fly a lot…you don’t get to be an asshole. The Premier who boarded right before me (during Prem Ex boarding might I add) stormed down the aisle with his 2 bags which were clearly too large to roll down the aisle. So he picked them up, grunted, and shoved them rather hard into the overhead. In doing so, he came within inches of smashing another passenger in the head and totally violently shook the guy’s seat. Anyone who travels with me knows that my number one pet peeve (well I guess I have a few) is when people use my seatback as their handrest/footrest and shake my seat. Drives me nuts. Anyways, as you can probably imagine, the violator in this case didn’t so much as acknowledge he did anything. Rude people like this need to grow up and get lives. You fly 30 times or 25000 miles in a year and suddenly you own the joint? I don’t know how FAs put up with these people.

Back on track…smooth air most of the way. Top notch crew. I’m totally a happy flyer!!! Glad to be back on United.

Only a day trip or two for the next week. March 25th is departure day for Dublin! The current itinerary is Albany -> Washington Dulles -> London Heathrow -> Dublin. Last leg is operated by BMI (if I recall correctly). A new airline for me!

Until next time,
Chris

Now I’m in the United Red Carpet Club waiting for other Flyertalkers to join me. Decent view from here. I’ve seen a China Air Cargo 747, Etihad A340, and more.

More to come…